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gaming_momma in big_kids

When is punishment too harsh?

My son who is about to be 8 in a couple of weeks, has been getting in a lot of trouble. He is about to be kicked from the bus for the remainder of the year, which will require him switching schools because I can't drive him. He just got a write up today for acting out in class. I can't get him to listen to me at home half the time. I have tried everything. Spanking, time out, screaming, talking, taking away special items, grounding from xbox and computer, extra chores, even grounding to his room. Its not like he is bored at school. He goes to a school for academically gifted children. He has been a problem child since day 1 and this is just too much. We are considering canceling his birthday. No gift from us. No cake. Family can do what they please. But I feel like giving him a cake and gift will be like rewarding him. And his behavior has been anything but deserving. We have tried rewarding him for good behavior as well. And that doesn't work. Please Help!! Any advice or thoughts would be appreciated.


Does he care about getting kicked off the bus or out of school?
Does he care about any of the punishments?

Typically, when a kid's acting out, it's a whole family issue (both helping to cause the acting out, or needing to deal with the acting out). Are you all in family counseling?
he does care about the bus. He told me a few times he "does not not not not not want to go to Taft" which is the other school. He is worried right now about losing privilege for a field trip. He gets upset about losing time on the xbox and PC. When I grounded him to his room he was very upset that he lost out on spending time with me and watching tv with the family after dinner.